PROOF THAT TOY STORY AND THE WALKING DEAD ARE THE SAME PLOT LINE

fartss in the wind

Holy s*** its been a while. I cannot begin to catch up. This is a quick thought. I'm living in Salt Lake City, Utah and going to hair school (?!!!??!) What the fuck happened?? Hah! Anyway, my quick simple thought is this: id rather sit with a bunch of piece-of-turd dumbfucks than simple farts in the winds with not an ounce of substance! :) goodbye. Will be back with more...

The Trajectory of The Advertising Man

I've Been Thinking?

So yes, it has been quite some time.
a)Time to re-group
b)Time to remember what's Important
c)all of the above

Everything has been whirling.

And recently I've been pondering...

-"Where is that turning point?" "- in which we find ourselves almost out of breath, wondering: 'when did everything turn to this?'"

I've been an spectator these past weeks. Watching myself forget how my nights end, my eyes heavy in the morning, my vision blurred; my hopes for my next big move. I've caught myself giving myself excuses for my behavior: "I'm in love," "I've been working hard," "My mother's hard to be around," "I'm still young (19) and should get some time to fuck around." So on and so forth. I started to feel a distant sting in my blood and bones that suggests I may be falling into the abyss of Nobody. Doing Nothing. Feeling only bits of my soul. I hate to sound melodramatic, but I can't focus on how I should sound to you, and this is when the chilling realization comes to light: "When does one truly 'grow up?'" And at this, I find myself glaring into myself and thinking quietly: "IT'S TIME TO WAKE THE FUCK UP!"

It's not hard to dissolve into the background static of a simple, quiet life.
It's easy to pretend you have all the time in the world...

I've been thinking about how others' lives are beginning to play into mine.
How I let them.
And how I praise them.

I've been thinking about the almost inevitable insignificance of my days.
How I keep waiting for a strange to come to me and say my future just got here and now is when i can begin the ambitious road I so deeply want. That now is when I can start being up at six in the morning, going out for jogs, spending hours on my work, and separating "my wants" and "my musts."

I don't want to wait anymore.

My future is happening as I write this.
My age, my youth is finding its stability and maturity as we speak.
Maturity doesn't show up on your 25th birthday to say, "delivery!" and throw a career at you.
Stability doing the same thing over and over again. It is to decide what matters most and keeping your word. Caring about you more than you care about what you have the power TO do.

Well, I feel like I'm rambling.
I just felt I needed to type down my latest thoughts.
Will be back soon.

The Big Bang Terror

The miniscule manner of my life thus far, has come to the its very edge; waving up at me in hopes to signal that "hey, it's time to jump over to the next huge mountain of (_______!)" Something like that. This kind of pressure is a little paralyzing - and in an effort to build the bridge from one chapter of your life to the other, you scatter around for tools that, in more that one way, are dangerously risky- but alluring. A bad combination for something that already dangles on the thread of "I want this."

But where can one draw the line between what is truly important and keeps one rightfully proud and brave, and that which is financially helpful and/or purely materialistic, but rarely humanly "necessary." I'm not advocating toward the belief that it is wrong or phony to WANT or STRIVE FOR things that one CAN, physically speaking, live without. I'm merely considering that an awfully rooted want for THINGS can be suffocating, limiting, and very stressful.

-My world is steadily becoming more about decisions that affect or are better for either one or the other, pride, simplicity, or THINGS, things, things, things, and money. And we all know: Money = Power; of the falsest, and most alluring, and undeniably seductive.

I've told my close confidant about my "hey, here I am; happy" picture. The one that's taken me years and years to sketch out. I'm not done adding all the colors, I'm sure. While speaking to this curly-haired wonder, something terrible registered: what I see in this canvas, so far, I don't doubt, but Fear.

Did I really draw a nice thick line between my worldly satisfaction, and my profound pioneering of the things one cannot touch?