FEBRUARY

I didn't write much for the month of January. Damn. I told myself I'd have at least TEN entries every month. I don't do this for anyone except for you, fellow reader. Thank you. What appears to be a simple act of reading a blog, to me, is phenomenal. I've always wanted my words to mean something to someone. It's debilitating, really. But I really don't ask for much. Simply some insight, some open-minded thought-process.
I don't know...
February just started and a month from now I will be eighteen.
I don't want to get older.
When I think about aging and loneliness and the physical weaking of one's strenght, I feel the same way I feel, when I'm sitting in a quiet room and I glance up a wall and become intesely aware of a clock, the kind with the really loud ticking sound; hollow.
I think February is that month when you truly realize that a new year has begun. In January, one is still trying to quietly grasp onto the year prior.
In Frebruary we're trying to get used to the idea of another year.

FIRST FEELING OF THE MONTH:
CONFUSED